I"m so sorry, this is my problem, it's not your problem.
"I need you to wave a magic wand!" Playful.
Use how and what questions to give illusion that other party in control. How am I supposed to do that...How would that work...What am I supposed to do...Until they land on answer you like, then heap on the praise, you are so smart...brilliant.
Prep them with "I'm sorry" at the front, not the end.
reflect and diminish, really good point, communicate you're on the same team--first priority. Then lower the anger a bit and get practical.